he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
