I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Randomize
