i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
