she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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