U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
