She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
she woke up with a sticky ear
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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