Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize
