I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
