nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
