i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
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