Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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