I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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