ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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