Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Randomize
