I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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