You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
