I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
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