Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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