I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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