Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
