I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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