so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
