morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
