She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I need a burrito and a hug.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
