You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
