what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
