Whod you bang
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
