did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
