Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Randomize