in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
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