are you still at the devil's house?
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
