I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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