Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
