also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
