Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
