it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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