No more Irish car bombs ever.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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