So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
