Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize