Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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