Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Randomize
