grandma shit on top of the toilet
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize