Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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