I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
