She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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