I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
