Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
