Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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