Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
