She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
